I'm Sexy....hmmm

I have an entertaining story from the other night, but I should preface this with another story and warning. Ummm, I think that it's safe to say that you should NEVER go to the grocery store at night. Just too many strange people lurking around at night.
About 8 or 9 months ago, I went to the grocery store looking like crap because it was after 10pm and who really cares. Hair in ponytail and SCRUBBY clothes. I'm happy to be finally done with shopping and as I'm exiting a man is walking in the exit. He is dressed in black leather chaps and jacket which are adorned with chains. (trying to give the impressioin of Harley Davidson biker dude I'm assuming) He was balding on top and the rest of his hair was long in a ponytail. He was about 5 ft. 3 ish and a little portly, maybe late 40's, and walked with a cane. His eyes bugged out of the head. He was also walking with another younger hippish looking fellow. My first thought is, "Oh, I'm blocking most of the doorway and he can't get through, I better move!" I back-up a bit to maneuver the cart and as I'm getting ready to pass I smile to say hello and he says, "OOOoooooo" with arching eyebrows and a smirk on his lips and then proceeds to look me up and down like I was a piece of meat! Meat people! For the love! Next thought.."that little twerp!" So I rolled my eyes at him and gave my best disgusted look as I finished walking past.

Obviously I didn't learn this lesson because the other night I went to Kroger again. I had been traveling and had returned to town and wanted to pick up some things after the kids in bed. Sounds good right? It was almost 10pm again because we had just finished watching Madagascar 2. Now, for anyone who hasn't seen that movie it has African Americans who play the voices of the hippos. The male hippo is attracted to the female hippo because she is so HUGE. She's hefty, round, and plumpy. He even sings a song with all those words in it. So, not to be happy about this next point, I myself am bigger than I want to be and feeling a little plumply myself, go out into the world....at night....bad idea. So I pull up close to the store and next to a nice looking, kinda pimped out, looking car. A black man is talking on his cell phone, walking to that car. I'm walking past and I hear a low "how's it going?" I figured he was talking to the person on the cell, but not wanted to seem rude I glance out of my eyes to see if he's talking to me. Yes, he is looking directly at me, so I just say, "hey." I keep walking and get almost to the doors when he starts calling out about something about the car. I thought he was saying that he thinks he scratched my car or that I scratched his. "what?" He repeats and I can't hear him. I start walking back but only to a certain distance because it is night people and I don't know this man. He was dressed nice, young, and if memory serves correct, he did have a nice collection of gold chains around his neck. I'm about 15 ft. away and say, "what?" His response. "You got a boyfriend?" (WHAT!!) It's been some time since I've been hit on, let me tell you, so it took me a minute to figure out what the heck this guy was getting at. Light dawns and I find the situation funny so I smile and say, "No, but I got a husband!" Looking slightly embarrassed but still smiling, he said, "oh, sorry I didn't see the ring." "No problem." As I start to turn to walk away he shouts out, "You SEXY though!" (just something for me to smile about I guess) And laughing inside I just raised my hand that was holding my keys straight up in the air and called back, "Thank You!" Not a I'm so happy thank you, but a I just told a funny joke infront of a large crowd and want to end with a bang thank you. (I just had to have you try to hear how I said it) I started laughing when I got into the store because I just had a black man tell me I was sexy. I called Craig and said, "I still got it babe, because apparently I'm sexy." Still thinking about Madagascar Craig says, "Is it cause (and he dropped is voice down low and sexy like the hippo) cause you hefty?" I started laughing so hard because I was thinking about the same thing. (Craig was just trying to be funny so don't think he a jerk!) I guess black men do find plumpy women attractive...OR he was just really desperate and then it's not funny anymore and just gross. I'm going to stick with the funny bit because it makes a better story. Please tell me that somebody elsee found this funny too. Moral: don't go shopping at night.